In the ‘eyes of the law’ there’s only one reason for divorce that’s legally valid – an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage. However, just saying that your marriage has broken down isn’t enough to justify a divorce, there needs to be a reason to back up that this is the case.
In our interview with David Berridge, Family Law Partner at Bray & Bray Solicitors, he describes the sorts of reasons that people use to back up the fact that their marriage is no longer viable.
Problems with other family members
Parents can sometimes be intrusive and voice their opinions when they’re not wanted, which can cause serious issues and months of arguments. Similarly, if you are very close to your parents and spend a lot of time with them, whilst your other half isn’t interested in being involved in family activities or problems, this can cause a serious divide.
If one of you wants children but the other doesn’t, or if one of you changes your mind a few months or years down the line, this is regularly a deal breaker when it comes to staying married.
In the same respect, when you’re going through pregnancy or when you have a child, it’s easy to forget to make time for your other half and not just time for a baby. Children almost always become top priority and it’s easy to forget you’re in a couple too, especially if there is very little privacy or time for intimacy.
Children from a previous relationship can also cause tensions and problems in terms of prioritisation. Not only do you potentially have to worry about ‘the ex’ who is the other parent of the child, but if the child decides that they don’t like you or if you argue with the child, it can cause a huge strain on a marriage and in some cases, can cause a parent to choose between their new spouse and their child from a previous relationship.
This one is probably extremely obvious, but can also stem from expectations. If your other half appears to be driven and ambitious, but changes their mind once they’re married, or even a few years down the line, leaving you to carry the financial burden of your futures, it can often seem very unfair. Similarly, work commitments can have huge strains on relationships – whether one person’s career takes them away from family time, or on the flipside if they’re made redundant or struggle to find a job that they enjoy, it can make one or both of you very unhappy. Stress from work usually impacts heavily on both people in a married couple.
Betrayal can be impossible to stomach for many people, so once adultery is committed there is often no turning back.
This may seem like another obvious one, but with mobile phones constantly glued to many people’s hands or differences in how you like to talk about your feelings, being in a marriage can feel just as lonely as being single for some people. Add having a different approach to confrontation or arguments, where perhaps one of you just shuts off and the other blows up like a volcano and you’ve got a recipe for divorce waiting to happen.
Sadly, this one is becoming more and more common. It’s all too easy to meet someone else or to live with someone without spending real quality time together, meaning that you may find that you have nothing in common anymore. Differences in life goals or something small but significant like the choice of whether to eat healthily or not can be the trigger that makes couples realise that the attraction is no longer there; they’ve fallen out of love or they’ve just become very different people.
Reasons for divorce
These are just a few of the reasons for divorce that can form part of a statement to back up why a marriage has irretrievably broken down as justification for a divorce. Sometimes a reason may not be seen as valid while in other cases, such as where a couple has been living as separate people for over 2 years, a reason may not be needed at all.
Advice about filing for divorce
For advice about whether to file for divorce and whether your reasoning is likely to be accepted by a judge, call our family law solicitors. Your first meeting with us can be at a fixed fee and we’ll only take action if and when you want us to, to ensure that we not only get the best results for you, but the ones that you really want.
Contact a divorce lawyer
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